And Now?

Well I am a bit delayed, but here's the dealio... Torran is too high functioning to qualify for the IBI/ABA. The clinical psychologist who assessed him for the government program though he might no even qualify on a biologically handicapped basis just by reasing his chart. That was interesting to hear!

She gave us the gentle let down... he's great, you've done great, but he won't be best serviced here.

Ok. So pat our family on the back, rah rah we're great.

She pointed out that he's at the "top of his class" for autism. Yes, I hear what you're saying. But I don't compare him to the severely autistic kids your program is aimed at. I compare him to his peer group.

That's where we find problems.

I hate having to point out Torran's developmental deficits. Yes, it would be so much easier to close my eyes and pretend everything is going to sort itself out.

That's just not the way this life works. In fact, I don't think there has been ANYTHING in my life that has been as simple as that.

So I ask her, are you suggesting he's not autistic. "Well he's somewhere on the scale", she replies.

Yes...??? And???

Her recommendation: a good structured nursery program, only half day really because it's obvious we're so good with him and he has the potential to learn from a naturalized environment.

Yes...??? And???

Torran is already in a pre-school play and learn a couple of times a week. When they do circle time at the end of the two hour semi-structured program, it took him months to adjust and fit into the same expectation. Yet when they sing songs he's not as involved as the other kids are. You can see it. As they get older, will he always be one step behind or will he be left in the proverbial dust?

Bruce and I are also feeling frustrated about our interactions with Torran. Without the IBI approval, we don't get access to the Jumpstart program which gives parents some advice about dealing with their autistic child at home. Not only that, but we get discharged from TPAS (Toronto Partnership for Autism Services) altogether... even though he is still autistic.

So now it's a 180 degree spin from holding back on nursery school because of his prematurity, my dislike of the germ pool that nursery school harbours, and his physical and developmental delays to avidly searching for relatively close and autism/disability supportive nursery that doen't have a wait list lasting until he gets to college.

If I just close my eyes...